- Bloodninja: Wanna cyber?
- MommyMelissa: Sure, you into vegetables?
- Bloodninja: What like gardening an s**t?
- MommyMelissa: Yeah, something like that.
- Bloodninja: Nuthin turns me on more, check this out
- Bloodninja: You bend over to harvest your radishes.
- (pause)
- MommyMelissa: is that it?
- Bloodninja: You water your tomato patch.
- Bloodninja: Are you ready for my fresh produce?
- MommyMelissa: I was thinking of like, sexual acts INVOLVING vegetables... Can you make it a little more sexy for me?
- (pause)
- Bloodninja: I touch you on your lettuce, you massage my spinach... Sexily.
- Bloodninja: I ride your buttocks, like they were amber waves of grains.
- MommyMelissa: Grain doesn't really turn me on... I was thinking more along the lines of carrots and zucchinis.
- Bloodninja: my zucchinis carresses your carrots.
- Bloodninja: Damn baby your right, this s**t is HOT.
- MommyMelissa: ...
- Bloodninja: My turnips listen for the soft cry of your love. My insides turn to celery as I unleash my warm and sticky cauliflower of love.
- MommyMelissa: What the f**k is this madlibs? I'm outta here.
- Bloodninja: Yah, well I already unleashed my cauliflower, all over your olives, and up in your eyes. Now you can't see. B**ch.
- MommyMelissa: whatever.
Source: fightercraft
I put on my robe and wizard hat... ;)
- Bloodninja: Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?
- BritneySpears14: Aight.
- Bloodninja: Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.
- BritneySpears14: I slip out of my pants, just for you, Bloodninja.
- Bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.
- BritneySpears14: Oh, I like to play dress up.
- Bloodninja: Me too baby.
- BritneySpears14: I kiss you softly on your chest.
- Bloodninja: I cast Lvl 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.
- BritneySpears14: Hey...
- Bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl 8 Penis of the Infinite.
- BritneySpears14: Funny I still don't see it.
- Bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty of the Beyondness.
- BritneySpears14: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.
- Bloodninja: Don't f**k with me biznitch, I'm the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.
- Bloodninja: I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl 2 Druid.
- BritneySpears14: Don't ever message me again you piece.
- Bloodninja: Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.
- Bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik's evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.
- Bloodninja: You still there baby? I think it's getting hard now.
- Bloodninja: Baby?
Source: chubbynerdbitchh
best. post. ever. made. on. tumblr.
i never stop reblogging this
(via dead-is-the-new-scene)
Source: giantblondeshemale
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